Saturday, June 06, 2009

Healing....myself and my Dad...

My dad is diagnosed recently with liver cancer. Yes, it's very heart wrenching to hear the news, and even more painful to see my father growing skinny day by day... As a son, I felt I am helpless to do something to help alleviate his physical suffering. A tremendous guilt enveloped inside me. I hated myself for not able to take care of his material needs.

I seek many opinions from friends who are in the medical profession and went along with him to see specialists, the results were quite dim...

So I asked a friend who does S.R.T and he helped... I knew my Dad has a lot of personal issues about failure and having all his negative feelings, all bottled up. So in a way, this cancer has actually grown inside him without him knowing for a long time. Seems that the mutated cell feeds on his negative energy and as such, it has developed into a cluster of tumors (that are still benign)... so I hope with the S.R.T therapy and suggestions, like affirmation and learning to let go of his negative emotional imbalances can help reduce the pain and the anguish...

I understood that the cycle of Life is like that, all things born will die when the time comes.. Again, a reminder of th Dharma teachings of Grand Master... I've learnt to deal with my guilt and now, although it's inevitable that my father will pass on but I want to make sure the remaining days of his life I want to spend as much time I can with him and let him know that I'm all grown up and am able to take care of myself...

Anatta... Anicca... Dukkha... These words from the Lord still rings very loudly now as in the past and will be in the future....

Sadhu!